You Raise Me Up

Throughout last week (or if I am very honest with myself, since I’ve gotten back to base), my dear colleagues have been a little worried about me. Apparently it’s written all over my face and I look a hot mess. It’s the New Year, a year filled with so much hope, dreams, fulfillment of purpose, but it seems my soul appears so downcast. I believe You Lord, so why the gloomy look?

The mountain climb has been a little overwhelming, for the wind of thought has appeared to me more violent than anticipated, the lantern almost snuffed out, and my feet no longer as steady as it ought to be; and the first month of the year has not fully ended yet, let alone the next 11 months of the year. I have started planning how to spend the rest of the year sleeping, that way my mind will not be playing tricks on me. Surely I cannot be slightly depressed? Wake up Life of a Stranger, wake up. Today you still have a choice. Choose life and you will see if God will not bring about your captivities as if it were a dream (Psalm 126:1-6)huh?

Let it go, Life of a Stranger.

I have fallen again this time deeper than I thought. I wasn’t expecting this. How did this happen, surely I was on the way up you may ask? Yeah I thought so too, why the gloomy view. But for a moment I took my eye off Jesus, and it happened, and now I’m back on the ring road trying to get off at the first Junction unto the straight path. I need to forget the mistakes of the past and look to the future, one so wonderfully paved with unimaginable joy. And a future that starts even now because today, this day is the day the Lord has made and I am commanded to rejoice and be glad (Psalm 118 vs. 24). The Lord Jesus tells you today He has forgiven you all of your sins, and you have been immersed and washed in His blood. That in itself is more than enough when life’s burden or worries tries to bring you to the point when it seems all hope is gone. Your SINS Are forgiven Life of a Stranger, did you hear that!! Eerm yeah

Get a grip Life of a Stranger.

Do you not know that in a race all the runners run, but only one gets the prize? Run in such a way as to get the prize – 1 Corinth. 9:24 – Why are you giving up on the race, you were doing so well. Gal. 5:7-(You were running a good race. Who cut in on you and kept you from obeying the truth?).YOU just need to push just that bit harder to the finishing line regardless of whatever You face. Acts 20: 24 (However, I consider my life worth nothing to me, if only I may finish the race and complete the task the Lord Jesus has given me—the task of testifying to the gospel of God’s grace).

But Lord, I keep falling.

And I will keep raising YOU UP until you get to the end of the race. So that Your testimony will be like that of Paul’s: I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith – 2 Tim. 4:7.Dear Lord I want to and NEED to Fight this fight and finish this race well by keeping Your Faith, but for how long?

Dear Life of a Stranger, don’t be like the pace setters in the long distance races that goes into strict training, lead the pack, only to drop out before the finishing line. For as long as it takes, keep pushing, because one day the race will end and there is a prize waiting at the end of it all. And because I love you with an everlasting love, I am always with you, even in the toughest of it all (Jeremiah 31:3-4). “But I don’t want to keep holding on. I’m tired of trying. What If I choose not to, what will happen? You will miss out on EVERYTHING I have put together for you. So keep holding on. You’ll see it really is beautiful. Cheer up; you are living in the best days of your life, and what better than to know that the creator of the whole wide world has got your back. You have to go through the refiner’s fire for Holy living (Zechariah 13:9), so that in the end everything in you that causes you to fall will be removed.

Really! Ok Lord, I’ll try.

And even though the young may get tired, because you Hope in Me (Isaiah 41:30-31), I will never disappoint you, and will strengthen you. You are the apple of my eyes (Deuteronomy 32:10, Zechariah 2:8). You are most precious to me, my master piece, my most cherished possession; I gave up all just so that you can have access to me. Stop worrying about yesterday’s mistakes and the troubles of tomorrow, for today has enough trouble’s of its own (Matthew 6:34), which Jesus has already overcome for you (John 16:33). Take heart,Stay alert, stay focused, and focus on ME.

Lord You’re just so deep. That’s why you just Rawk you know.

*sigh* Kiss Kiss, I love you Lord. I feel so much better now. So you should. I KNOW I rawk……..

Yay….. Bring on February!!!.

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Confused

I have to confess I am indeed one of those that like to make plans (well I don’t have much of a social life, so I guess that explains a great deal), thoroughly enjoy the planning process and look forward to the execution of the plan, but for some reason totally beyond my control, something always comes up that prevents the plan from coming together, which really unsettles me. I hate to admit this, but this has been going on for many years now. And each time am always left wondering what the point of the planning, looking forward and holding on was really about. Especially, when it appears that the seeds I plant always seems to get uprooted. A feeling that tends to overwhelm and move me to a state of confusion.

Genesis 4:6-7: Then the LORD said to Cain, “Why are you angry? Why is your face downcast? If you do what is right, will you not be accepted? But if you do not do what is right, sin is crouching at your door; it desires to have you, but you must master it.”

One thing I’ve learnt and found is that whenever am not in the word I tend not to get a firm grip on my emotions. Yet, I keep making this mistake repeatedly, as in when will I learn? I tend to worry a lot, and tend to believe the lie of the enemy. I also tend to forget that it is what Christ says about me that matters at the end, and also that making heaven is actually our most important goal in this life and everything else and the comforts of life is the extras that come when we PLEASE God.

Like in the bible passage example that I gave because Cain lost control of his emotion, he lost out completely in his destiny, I wonder what kind of life it would have been. Am sure it would have been filled with so much regret. And even if we were to repent of our mistakes the damage has already been done, not just to the person but also to you, and to your relationship. I guess Cain didn’t think much of his brother Abel, lacked respect, and probably thought he was the reason for his problems. A feeling of being unappreciated and being surrounded with so much negativity. And so aptly narrated by David, in Psalm 41:9 – “Even my close friend, whom I trusted, he who shared my bread, has lifted up his heel against me

My life should be a life of commitment, that my Yes be Yes and No be No. That everything I have said I would do, and given my word to do to stick to it. I am tired of having a story to tell or a reason why something I said I would do didn’t get done. I want to be able to make a difference with my life, that this 2009 will no longer be a year of planting and uprooting, and that every thing I sow will remain planted and no longer uprooted by MY hand.

So TODAY wonderful saviour, I ask thee oh Lord to help me MASTER my emotions, so that it will not lead me to a life time filled with regret. Open my eyes Lord to see what is happening around me, and understand the devices of the enemy. Help me Lord to be a committed Christian. Let my word determine my behaviour and help me Lord to do YOUR will and not mine. Let your power be revealed in my life and empower me for Holy living. That no more stories be associated with my life. For indeed I am a city on a hill. Lord this year I pray for your Wisdom as I plan my affairs. I no longer want to suffer for lack of knowledge of the devices of the enemy (Hosea 4:6 God tells us, “My people are destroyed for lack of knowledge.”). Help me Lord to be always vigilant and ready with your armour to combat the desires of the Flesh (Ephesians 6:10-17; Romans 12:1-2). Dear Lord, I want to be the man you spoke of in Malachi 2:5-6 – 5 “My covenant was with him, a covenant of life and peace, and I gave them to him; this called for reverence and he revered me and stood in awe of my name. True instruction was in his mouth and nothing false was found on his lips. He walked with me in peace and uprightness, and turned many from sin. I don’t want to take you dear Lord for granted. Not to mistake your love and your coming to my level as to do however I please. I don’t want to be contemptuous of You. I want to know what You want from me Lord, and things you don’t want from me. Dear Lord I want to live a life filled with your spirit. A life worthy of You. I know that what I’ve gone through and am going through have been a time of the sifting period (Luke 22:31-32), removing the things in me that does not bring glory to you, Lord I ask even in these times help me not to sin against you, and that my faith will stand the test of time.

What have you done lately?

Idi mma (You are Good)

In the midst of my sorrow, He granted me peace, in the midst of my confusion He gave me joy, in the midst of dishonour, He upheld me, in the midst of disgrace, He displayed me, and in the midst of my enemies, He enlarged my footsteps so that I would continue to stand head and shoulder above them – this was my testimony for 2008

Wow, it’s the New Year already.

In my last and final post for 2008 I testified of the goodness and greatness of God throughout the year of 2008. The year that the Lord was too good to me, and if I were to start testifying of His goodness and greatness, I wouldn’t have known where to begin, for the King of Glory was indeed so good to me, the Lord that only knows how to be good, was good to me, and indeed there is no one like Him, for He granted me total victory. However, Four days after the post, my favourite person in the whole wide world, the woman next to my mother, who taught me so much, and whom I lived to make proud passed away. Ever since I was a little girl, my grandmother had suffered a life filled with one illness after another. Mother told me that even as a young girl, Granma was given her last rites as a catholic, because they thought she was going to die even then. She had lost her husband at a very young age and a few years into her marriage, but that did not stop her from praising, worshiping and holding unto the promises of God (She was later honoured by the Pope as a Dame, and a woman who made history every where she went, a dynamic woman filled with the Love and Spirit of the Lord). In spite of the illnesses over the many years, she lived to see her 80th birthday, and for that Lord I am grateful. Dear Lord, You have always been good, and only know how to do good. Thank you Lord for making me a grand daughter she was proud of, and giving me the opportunity to grow with her, for the times spent, and the many lessons I have learnt that have been invaluable to me as a young woman who intends to live a life that honours God. The journeys might not be an easy one, but we fall only to rise again stronger. Thank you Lord too for the opportunities my siblings also had, and how she was able to watch us all grow into men and women she was happy to call her own. Thank you Lord for doing us good. You Lord have indeed been the greatest healer, and indeed there is no one like you. King of Kings there is no one like you.

It is now 2009, and now the 16th of the very first month of the year, and the Lord is still telling me that He is still a good God, and will always be good to me. He has reminded me to go to: Isaiah 46:9-10 – “Remember the former things of old, for I am God, and there is no other; I am God and there is none like Me, declaring the end from the beginning and from ancient times things that are not yet done.” To go back to the promises He has made to me over the years, for He is watching to see that every word He has promised to me, to bring to pass (Jer. 1:12- The LORD said to me, “You have seen correctly, for I am watching [a] to see that my word is fulfilled.”). To re-examine them all again. That It doesn’t matter how long I’ve had them, and to keep holding onto them. For this has been a time for preparation. That the heavens have opened and the rains have started to pour, but I needed to be ready for it; to prepare for greatness. That this is no longer a time for planting and uprooting. That the seeds we have sown will remain planted, and a time we will enjoy the fruits of our labour. That this is No longer a year of fruitless efforts in Jesus Name, Amen. The seeds that we have sown, will remain planted in Jesus Name, Amen, and will be a year of our longings fulfilled. No more a year of wandering in the wilderness, but a year of divine visitation.

So Lord, in preparation of this: This year O God I ask You to search me, for this year I want to experience the manifestation of your promises in my life. This is the year I want to live a life devoid of sin, search me dear Lord, and grant me grace to remove all the things in my life that offends you oh Lord. For I need your visitation dear Lord this year, and every day of my life. I ask You Oh Lord that I may see myself the way you see me, and hear what you say about my life. My Lord and King, every corner of my life, I desire that the Holy Spirit will visit me, and continue to, and indeed find in me a habitation for God’s glory. Lord I want to honour you in every aspect of my life, in Jesus Name, Amen. Lord I pray that anything in my life and in the life of the people reading this that will hinder them from receiving your divine visitation this year, by your grace and mercy I ask that you remove right now in the name of Jesus, Amen. And that every heart may be prepared to receive a visit from heaven, and the Life of God may begin to manifest so that His people may carry His glory, in Jesus Name Amen.

I know I want to see the glory of God in my life this 2009. Don’t you? (Matthew 5:8 – Blessed are the pure in heart, for they will see God).