It was ALL in VAIN!!

Therefore I do not run like a man running aimlessly; I do not fight like a man beating the air. No, I beat my body and make it my slave so that after I have preached to others, I myself will not be disqualified for the prize – 1 Corinthians 9:26-27.

If only you would lend me your ears and listen to my story. I sighed. This story must be told, and you must hear me I continued.

As a young lass growing up, the fear of going to hell drew me even closer to the man called Jesus Christ. I came to learn very early on in life that if I must NOT make it to hell, that I had to forgo all other religious belief and focus on that man called Jesus Christ; for indeed everyone I asked told me that the only sure way of not going to hell was to go by the way of this man who was said to have died on a cross some two thousand years ago [apparently He was a son of God]. Now I wasn’t there when it happened all those years ago, but one thing I did know was if by any chance there was indeed life after death, I didn’t want to be on the wrong side. And so the journey began. I joined all the groups that professed Him; embarked on all the activities that involved telling everyone and anyone about him and his Love for the world. Journeyed to the end of the world to see that His message was spread, and one day, when the time came for me to leave this world, convinced that I had done all that was necessary, closed my eyes and waited for that faithful day when all would be revealed.

And so that day came. There was indeed life after death, and I was a witness to the fact. The books were flung open, and faithfully there was a record. There was a record of everything that I ever did, but for some reason (or another); my name was missing in that all important book.

To make matters worse, when I thought I caught a glimpse or a silhouette of Him, the words fail me now, but it was Him that I saw. The man I had worked tirelessly my whole life. I called out to him and said to him, Hello there, it is I, and you are? He responded. Perplexed, puzzled, taken aback, this must be a nightmare, I thought. And then He continued, I do not know you, away from me you evil doer. Evil doer, me, I, how? Did I not work miraculous deeds on account of this man? Did I not preach his message to my colleagues, to my friends, to everyone that came in contact with me? Did I not set up a bible study group in my department for the “overly learned man”? Did I not hold a coveted position in my church, and a strong Pillar in the house of God? No, no, NO!! Did I not wrought good works on account of this man? Did I not?? DID I NOT!! How can He then now call me an Evil doer, when I was so good to the poor? By Jove, I set up so many charities, and no less than ten bears my name, and for what? FOR WHAT? What was the point of it all?

Then He responded to me and said: Not everyone who says to me, ‘Lord, Lord,’ will enter the kingdom of heaven, but only he who does the will of my Father who is in heaven Matthew 7:21. But I did the will of your father I responded. I got baptized, spoke in other languages, forsook all other gods, and followed only you. ONLY YOU!! And He looked upon me and said, but you did not truly believe in the Word of God. It is not about the number of people who got saved through you, yes, see those actions have laid up treasures for you here (and He pointed at them), for indeed God cannot change His words (Numbers 23:19; 1 Samuel 15:29); But you see His Word is magnified and exalted above all His name (Psalm 12:6; Psalm 119:89; Psalm 138:2; Proverbs 30:5; Romans 11:28-29). And then I interrupted Him, saying, I don’t quite understand how this has to do with my present state.

He continued saying, The Word of the Father was given to you saying, How He has exalted the name of Jesus, and How at HIS name, EVERY KNEE (Whether it is spirit, with human form or without), would bow (Isaiah 45:23-24; Philippians 2:9-11). I nodded, and said, it in the Word. Then He said, And Yet The Father compares HIS WORD to HIS name, in saying that His WORD is Magnified above HIS HIGHLY exalted NAME. I still didn’t get it, and? Yet you showed disrespect for HIS WORD. Every time you slight the authority of God’s word, you not only show disrespect of it, you also at the same time disrespect His HIGHLY EXALTED name. You show disrespect for the blood of Christ shared on the cross for all (Rev. 19: 13 – He was clothed with a robe dipped in blood, and His name is called The Word of God). Every Time you doubted His Word, You Disrespected HIS HIGHLY EXALTED NAME and all that the Lord Jesus did on the cross. And who are you, to darken the counsel of the MOST HIGH GOD, with words without knowledge (Job 38:2).

And then it hit me like a ton of bricks. Immediately I fell to the ground on my face and started to weep, for all those times and refused to be consoled. For all those times, I doubted the Validity of His Words concerning my life. I wept and refused to be consoled, For He was justifiably right. How can He say all was well, when mockers gathered and laughed at me? How could He say that I am the Head and not the tail, when all I saw was failures? It was easier to encourage others, but it was impossible to encourage my soul. How could He say that He grants the desires of our hearts when my 25 years longing was yet to be fulfilled. How did He expect me to truly believe when there were some irreconcilable issues with some of what His words were saying concerning my situation? No, how did He expect me to go on holding unto His word, when the future looked bleak. I wept, and wept, and wept and refused to be consoled.

And then I woke up.

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It was NO secret.

I walked into a wedding rehearsal, realising that it wasn’t a scheduled church event preceded to leave. Louisa was finally getting married and I couldn’t quite believe it. She’d been one of those mid to late thirties ladies who you happen to see in a church completely sold out and still no man to call their own. But it was her turn. Finally her time had arrived. As I slowly tried to make my exit, Pa K called out to me and said to me, today I will come with you to visit your home. I wasn’t quite sure how to respond to that. You see my Papa was one those who neither allowed visitors or friends to visit our home. Our house was one when looked in from the outside appeared to be a place that was quite desolate and no one would dear to venture in. It had creaky doors that annoyed the neighbours whenever someone tried to walk in through them. Broken porches and a gate hanging off its hinges. Papa kept no friends. No confidant, none. I immediately interrupted Pa K to remind him that we were in the middle of a rehearsal and I doubt Louisa will be impressed if he were to leave. He smiled and continued, her time of visitation has come she doesn’t need me to seal it.

As we left the church building, I got into the front seat of Pa K’s car and we continued unto the A406. In no time we were in Edmonton Green, and already parked in front of house number 20 George Braham Street. To my delights we were home and Pa K driving was definitely something to emulate. I unlocked the front gate, gingerly walked up the front porch and saw that my eldest brother BimB was by the sitting room window talking with my Papa. I signalled we had a visitor and he rolled over a blue marble to tell me that the coast was clear. As we walked closer to the front door, I slowed down the pace of my walk and began to lag behind Pa K. And by the time we’d reached the front door, he’d reached there before me. I could see from the door window that Papa looked at BimB in bemusement and was about to ask him who the man was when I saw Pa K confidently reach out his hand and introduced himself. I immediately sprung out from where I was, grinning from cheek to cheek, holding the hem of my dress firmly and saying …. Papa ahm, Papa, ahm, errm, erm, hmm, mmm, this is my Pastor and he insisted that he must come to our house.

To my surprise Papa gave out a smile and offered him a seat. He received him so warmly as such has never happened in the history of our home. BimB and I looked at each other, and I watched all three men sit down. After what seemed to be like a fraction of the time Pa K had arrived he had confidently asked Papa and BimB if they wanted him to pray for them and if they didn’t mind kneeling down. And to my amazement Papa and BimB both knelt down and I offered Papa a large cushion to rest his knees. This was history in the making. I never knew Papa could smile, I’ve never seen him smile in my entire 26years. On this day He smiled and jovially spoke to Pa K, and I proceeded to call in KK, my younger brother to come and see for himself what was going on in the house. Whilst they were talking Pa K went on to tell Papa the story of his life, and this was where it all began!!

I watched Papa go into the next room get out a large A3 paper and start to scribble on it. He drew what seemed to be a cadaver in the middle of a floor, in what seemed to be an open space, a theatre of some sort, surrounded by his five friends (two young ladies and three young men). On this occasion they were his friends from Medical school and they were all there surrounded by so many equipment. Something had happened, someone had done something terribly wrong and each of them had been sworn to secrecy. They didn’t think anyone saw them. They didn’t think anyone would know. As Papa finished his drawing He went on to call all of his friends. He had kept in contact with Rhodes, and Rhodes knew how to locate the others, and they all came. They all came one after the other and in no time they had all arrived. This was the first time in thirty five years they had all been together in one place. Papa didn’t waste too much time, and went on to show them the drawing. They all looked at each other and asked him what the purpose of it all was for. He told them that a man had narrated to him this scene so precisely that he had to draw his descriptions in order to find out where the man could have been when it happened. He asked them to fasten their eyes properly on the drawing and proceeded to guide them through it.

After they had all carefully looked at the drawing they realised that the only way anyone could have possibly seen them could have only ever been through a very large window which faced upwards. But how could it be, they were on the third floor, and they had locked themselves in. Papa realising that there was indeed a witness to their indiscretion, to their oath, to their covenant, wanted his friends to know that their secret was never one and had been witnessed all this while by an important witness. God. His friends not believing of his story sought out ways to kill Pa K, for they were convinced that Pa K had to have been a witness. For it was impossible for anyone to have known or seen what they had done all those years; what they did on the top floor of that building unless they were not among them.

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You’re probably thinking lifeofastranger has come again with her Fantastic story 😉 But I’m going somewhere with this 😀 HOLD ON!

So easily with our mouths and actions we enslave ourselves. Thinking that since no one has seen us or can see us, WHAT WE DO IN SECRET REMAINS A SECRET. This we know CANNOT BE TRUE, because the word of God reminds us in Psalm 90:8 You have set our iniquities before You, Our secret sins in the light of Your countenance – that God sees everything we do ESPECIALLY the ones we think that no one will ever find out. How sad, for indeed our lives are never hidden from Him (Psalm 69:5 – O God, You know my foolishness; And my sins are not hidden from You). And since one can only reap what they have sowed (Galatians 6:7-8Do not be deceived: God cannot be mocked. A man reaps what he sows. The one who sows to please his sinful nature, from that naturewill reap destruction; the one who sows to please the Spirit, from the Spirit will reap eternal life.), therefore what they have gained from it all, can only lead them to death and destruction, for we have been reminded that the wages of sin is death (Roman 6:23 – For the wages of sin is death, but the free gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord). If Papa had known that his secret action could have brought about such wretchedness in his life, I wonder, would he have knowing gone into it? I pray that this would never be our story in Jesus Name. Amen.